This whisky is sold, despite the "very rare" on its label, in just about every single liquor store in Pennsylvania. The label must only apply to it's status in Scotland, whose shelves are apparently blissfully unaware of the nightmare inside this glass bottle. I'm guessing the anonymous Scot that 'distilled' it woke up one day, realized he was Scottish, and just said "Fuck it. I'm Scottish, right? I'm making some whisky." He was really reaching for the stars, that guy. Afterwards, he took one swill, spouted some Scottish colloquialism that probably boiled down to "shite!", vomited, and shipped that shit as far away as he could......which for some reason was Pennsylvania. Who knew?Forget the glass bottle pedigree. This whisky shatters that concept completely, just like Inver House shatters everything remotely related to tasting, smelling, or feeling that your body is capable of doing. Hearing and sight? Fuck it, take them too. What about a sixth sense? You can talk to ghosts, you say? Nope, not anymore. It's bad........really damn bad. A shot of it is equivilant to being curb stomped, but mixing it is akin to being curb stomped by someone wearing a pink fuzzy slipper. It dulls it a bit, but it'll still ruin your fucking day. And if you have a flask you value at all, don't let this shit within 30 feet of it unless you're inside a catholic church, or happen to be drinking with one of those edgy priest stereotypes who used to box back in the day and sneaks a nip every now and then from under his cassock. Anything less than holy water might never get the taste of it out of the metal.
Bottom line, it tastes horrible. But for all you just read, that fact might actually be irrelevant...it might not even make it to your lips. If you've had enough to drink, one whiff of this shit might actually be enough to bring it all back up. That's hardly what I ask my whiskeys (or whiskys, for that matter) to do though, and why pay $8.49 for something that your finger could do for free?
See it in the whiskey aisle? Keep right on going.......with your pace quickening to an eventual sprint in the opposite direction .
$8.49/fifth
- Matt
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3 comments:
Awesome review, here's mine:
http://twitter.com/scotchreviews/status/9406384811
I'm drinking some right now. I actually think it's pretty good. It's a smoother, sweeter Sailor Jerry's... Wait. Why does this taste like spiced rum?
This whisky is sold, despite the "very rare" on its label, in just about every single liquor store in Pennsylvania. The label must only apply to it's status in Scotland. wedding wines
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